I'mb naught [sic]

I'm not sick. This is what I keep telling people. I'm fine. Maybe, possibly, some few days ago I was afflicted with some kind of bug but presently I am at worst, recovering from a temporary dysfunction of the sinuses. I'mb naught sick.

"You sound sick," Amara said to me this afternoon. Kat agreed.

"No! I'mb better now! It no longer feels like I'm inhaling razor blades whenever I breathe. I've actually improved dramatically since this morning!"

Abby told me this morning to go home. Not so much because she cares, but because I hand her a lot of work these days and she doesn't want me to add a file folder of pneumonia to her work load. She was probably right, I shouldn't try to be a hero. I'm not good at being sick though. I wasn't tired or anything so I would have had to sit at home on the couch watching gawd awful daytime television while surrounded by a mountain of Kleenex. I did try to avoid making any phone calls today though because my voice sounds pretty funny.

Last night I tried to sleep sitting up so I could sort of breathe. I also put a dab of Vicks in my nose, which burned more than helped. I had some pretty weird dreams too. I talked to Michael Buble in a bathroom and I think I went snow tubing with George Stromboulopoulos. See, I'mb naught sick. I'm on acid, or whatever Vicks is made of.

Actually, aside from this stupid nose running/stuffing thing, the day was pretty good. The Shoe of the Day on my page-a-day calendar was a pretty pink sandal; I was randomly added by some interesting guy on Facebook; the vending machine guy gave me a free bag of chips; a lady complimented me on my shoes while I was at the photocopier; I made the early bus home; I found a new, shiny penny on the ground after I got off the bus; and I got my income taxes refund in the mail today. I'm telling you, I'mb feeling too habby to be sick!*

*Unless somebody would like to buy me ice cream to make me feel better ;)