I've read books like this before, but how would the story end in real life?

After three weeks of being left hanging wondering what happened to my Facebook Flirt, he suddenly came back. His computer had crashed. Even after all that time though, he was still head over heels for me.

We were chatting this week and talked again about meeting up. I warned him that I'd probably be shy. He said that was okay, he'd be shy too. I couldn't believe that at all, coming from the guy who randomly contacted me and had no problem telling the world of Facebook that I was something special.

His affection was almost intimidating. Nobody had ever honoured me with such sweetness before. I kept wondering if he was for real and I worried about meeting and the magic all suddenly ending.

Tonight he was talking about some big houses he toured in the Parade of Homes. He dreamed of one day owning one. He asked me where my house was and so I told him. The tone of the conversation changed. He said he was no longer sure. He told me the neighbourhood he lives in and it's not exactly a place I'd want to park Truck in for any length of time. He said:

i'm thinking i have to get a lot more done before dating ,meeting ,going out with someone like you who is way ahead of me

And I honestly started to cry. How many times have I felt not good enough, smart enough, pretty enough, for someone yet so proud of my independence? And now, here I was, finally enough for someone, but maybe too much.

So I tried to tell him that money, houses, cars, didn't matter to me. He is full of drive and ambition which is so admirable. He has more heart than any of the last smattering of guys I've met. I said all these things, but were they true?

He asked if this changed things. I said I didn't know. I said I still wanted to meet him at least once. Because yes, I want to give the guy a chance, like I give anyone. If there's one thing I've learned in love it's that you have to take things one day at a time. But really, could it work? Could he really feel happy with me when I pull up in my shiny Truck and go home to my safe house in the suburbs? I don't want to kill his pride and I don't want to feel apologetic for everything I've accomplished.

The conversation ended flatly. I said I had to go to bed but really I ended up here, blogging. My head hurts and I'm tired. I have so many thoughts in my head. This entry is a mess and is probably missing chunks of detail. I can't type anymore. I know, I'm being dramatic again.